Matt's Millennium Stew

Today's Millennium Stew --------
Penthouse Pets, Cher with longitudinal lines

by Matt Markovich
Everything2000 Stewmaster

How about replacing Fergi with Nikki. That was Bob Guccione's suggestion to the organizers of New York's Times Square ball drop. After reading in the news that Sarah Ferguson, The Duchess of York, will not participate in Times Square's New Year's Eve celebration, the founder and publisher of Penthouse magazine proposes that Nikie St. Gilles, the Penthouse Pet of the Year for 1999 should have the honor of dropping the New Year's Eve ball alongside Mayor Giuliani.

Guccione says he thinks New Yorkers would enjoy partying on this special night with Nikie and some of the other Penthouse Pets. He says she's beautiful, intelligent, poised, articulate, speaks four languages and is a talented designer. Guccione did not say if she would get naked when the clock strikes midnight.

Without John Harrison, Jimmy Buffett could never have written his song Changes in Attitude, Changes in Latitude. Who is John Harrison you ask? Well, he's big enough to have a movie about him. Film star Jeremy Irons is to play John Harrison, the man who solved the problem of measuring longitude and latitude in a British movie to mark the millennium according to London's Channel 4. Longitude-the distance of any place on the world's surface east or west of Greenwich-was virtually impossible to measure until 18-century English clockmaker rose to the challenge and invented the world's first almost frictionless clock.

And Cher, who just turned 50, will be strutting her stuff on New Year's Eve for all to see in Atlantic City doing two shows at Caesars, including a midnight show that has an expected front row ticket price of $1,000. No telling how much she's getting, but we don't think it's anywhere near the reported $13 million Barbra Streisand is getting for doing one show on New Year's Eve at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas.... Now that's Diva Las Vegas!

DATE: 8/25/99

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